Monday, March 2, 2009

The Stepford Wife

So here is something super important that has been on my mind for a while. I want to know, when am I going to feel and look like a grown up? hehe Ok, so it's not really important at all!

I always ask Tommy, "Do I look like an adult?", "Does this outfit look like something a doctor's wife would wear?", "Are you really going to wear that? You're going to be a DOCTOR!". Maybe my problem is that I have this stereotypical picture in my head (that I've had since I started dating Tom). I'm an old movie buff and when I see living as a doctor's wife I see Doris Day and James Garner in the "Thrill of it All" - perfect hair, make-up, outfit. Husband in his spare time wearing his suit or smoking jacket around the house. Nanny taking care of the children and maid cleaning and cooking for our family! Me being involved in the community with different organizations, balls, and social functions and those around me in awe of how I keep it all together and of Tom's career. (Truly, this is my dream!)
Ok, someone slap me back into reality.

But really, I feel it is important to be professional looking and be involved in the career that my husband has chosen. I've lived in the "fishbowl" for quite a while now, I was very involved with leadership in college, and was constantly lectured in group meetings about how important everything I did was. Obviously, most people weren't listening and I was one of the only RA's that didn't get in trouble for drinking or doing drugs with students living on our floors. Anyway......I still believe it is important, not to be materialistic, but to look and act, more importantly, appropriately for the job, life, and respect that you want.

This weekend we ran into a 3rd year resident that I had never met before and I was shocked when Tom said that he was a doctor. He looked like a 17 year old, hoodlum, that had just rolled out of bed in his jammies, and thrown a hat on, backwards, might I add. But, I just thought, as a patient, if I saw my doctor out in public looking like that, would I still have faith in his abilities? Would I question his judgement on medical advice since his judgement on looking and acting professional was very lacking? I don't know, hopefully, I won't ever see my doctor looking like that and have to find out and certainly I won't be letting my hubby dress like that so any of his patients have to struggle with that dilemma.

So, I guess what I really want to know is, what should a cute soon-to-be doctor wear in his spare time? My husband wears jeans and Old Navy solid tees most of his time off, but cleans up super nice when we have a event that calls for a more dressed up look, and more importantly can put together an outfit on his own that makes himself look dashing. I certainly know that I could spruce up my wardrobe, some income will be nice in July, but try to look as nice as I can for different occasions and even to run to Wal-Mart.

Hopefully, we are doing our part to keep the "Doctor Stigma" alive and in a fashionable place. I'm going to get my pearls now to put on before I head to the bedroom for naptime. Hopefully Doris and James would be proud!


  1. I totally suck at portraying a doctor's wife. One of my goals this year is to wear make-up. LOL! We should start a blog for wives to talk about issues and problems and feelings related to being a doctor. What do you think? I'd love to have a place to go to discuss things where people can relate.

  2. This is an area I am weak in, but I totally agree with your perception of what a doctor's wife "should" do and look like. Honestly, it terrifies me. I used to be a professioanl and dress well but after the baby, well... ha ha it doesn't fit the same! And my nursing clothes are so comfy, tmi... :) I need to get back on my diet, ha ha. It's ironic because I felt much more comfortable being "a doctor's wife" when I was the "director" than as a stay-at-home-mom (even though I'm more proud of the latter) - I just remember a lot of stigma against my mom / family growing up from people who thought SAHMs don't DO anything, grr.... off topic rant, ok. :)

  3. I thought maybe you might be talking about Kyle, but the third year and backwards hat told me it was someone else. :)

    I think it is most important to be who you are and not live up to a stigma. I actually think it's kinda cool when I see professionals wearing something unexpected.

    Go with what you like... if it's the dresses and pearls, awesome! Me, I'll be sticking to the yoga pants and t-shirts. :)

  4. Hmmm - I agree with you about looking nice definitely, but I think it's just more of who I am. I will say that I run to wal-mart (especially while I'm pregnant) in yoga pants and t-shirts!! I always feel more confident when I look nice, so generally that's the rule of thumb for me. Bye the way, I think Chris pointed out the same dr. to me this weekend - I was kind of thinking the same thing!!

  5. I have really never kept the appearance of a doc's wife. Luckily for me, I don't have to here.

    Most of my neighbors/friends could care less what my hubby does for a living. They are typically spouses of someone with a higher rank in regular army. That's what matters.

    I'd love for someone to call "What not to wear" and turn me in!! Most days, I'm in my exercise attire or yoga pants. My closet could really use some updating.

    You're post reminded me of one Joy did a while back, and the opinions of some not too nice strangers. You'd be intrigued.